I believed that “cars” was a phase I’d eventually outgrow like video games and skateboarding, especially being a dad of a two-year-old at the time of this writing. Many told me “you’ll eventually grow out of it, with a kid your life will be over, you have to make sacrifices,” and “your life won’t be the same.”

And for a time I believed them… But they were wrong.

I didn’t outgrow it.

My life is progressing, probably better than it’s ever had – definitely ain’t over.

I’ve made sacrifices.

And my life isn’t the same.

Ok… so they were right for two of the four. That’s 50% which is an “F” in my book :p

Your goals can still be achieved. Having kids can (and does) slow down goals, but it doesn’t mean they’re no longer attainable. I took a hiatus in the middle of an autox season because my son was born. A few months later I returned and picked up where I left off. I feel like stepping away for a little while strangely helped me to DRIVE better…

An appropriate mindset complements this too. If I believe my goals are over… then well, I’ve already set up myself for that pathway. I know new parents who’ve eventually finished their goals: graduated college, started a business, and travelled to Rome.

Is it easy? Definitely not.

Can it take a while? Yup.

It is realistically possible. Just recognize the opportunities and allow yourself to partake in them. (For the record, I’ve been itching/looking/not looking for a new car… my 2014 STI, an unmodified white one in either a hatch or sedan.)

You still need “you” time. “Self care in essence is the mindful taking of time to pay attention to you, not in a narcissistic way, but in a way that ensures that you are being cared for by you.“ The aftermarket car culture has always been therapeutic for me whether it’s working on, looking for, reading on, or DRIVING cars. Why would I want to cut out of my life something un-harmful that genuinely brings me joy? It doesn’t make sense but that’s exactly what I tried doing and ended up feeling worse.

There was one word that described how I felt:

Deprived. Like seriously.

Your health is important. You only get one body and one life. It needs to be taken care of. Some people take care of their cars more than their health (*raises hand) “Guilty!”

Many people get into the car culture for many reasons… whatever it is, ultimately you’re here because you enjoy it right? Stay because you enjoy it too!

You have a potential prodigy in the making. I wonder if my kids will take a interest in cars like I have when they grow up. If they do, then great! If not… then I’ll make em like it.

Just kidding!

But how cool would it be if they get into the culture and they become a ten times more passionate about it? What if they become a hundred times more badass about it? A thousand times more talented? Go to depths of it that you only dreamed of doing?

“We are what they grow beyond. That is the true burden of all masters.”

Master Yoda

On top of that you can enjoy the culture together as a family and continue on a legacy. The potential of that alone sounds beyond satisfying!

You realize the greatest things in life are not things. As much as I love this stuff, when it’s all said and done, it really is… just another hobby of mine. The biggest thing I look forward to after work doesn’t have anything to do with cars. It’s coming home and seeing my son smile and run to greet me when I walk through the door. It’s kissing the wifey, making dinner, and eating together at the table.

Aftermarket car parts, multiple projects, air suspension, etc are all nice things to have. There’s nothing wrong with wanting and having nice things – I feel like that all the time. However, things like that easily come and go. I learned that I don’t have to get that thousand dollar part for my build in order to be happy.

Those of you with children know that the feeling is unlike anything you’ve felt. It’s the greatest thing I’ve felt and my family would not be possible without my wife and son. They are my DRIVE and they will be my greatest build.

Cheers to my fellow dad’s out there building their cars and their legacies at the same time! Keep DRIVING!